Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
I Thes 5:18
Yesterday we captured Jack sitting up for at least 20 seconds all on his own. It felt like a minute because I screamed to my sister to take a screen shot since we were on face time having a great conversation and she managed to capture this picture. He did it! The screeching excitement from Renee and I probably made him freeze in position before he toppled over! :) He has been working so hard on his core muscles at OT and PT and I am so proud of him. I have signed up to be his biggest encourager and I can't help but to be beaming with excitement for him.
We had a big appointment this past Wednesday at Children's as Jack had his EEG. We were concerned about him shaking his head back and forth for a few seconds. It would happen occasionally throughout the day. I was able to catch him doing this once on a video and we sent it to the doctor. She ordered an EEG and to be completely honest I have been so worried about it for the past couple of weeks. I wouldn't openly come out and explain my feelings, or I should say fears, but it was coming out in a variety of ways, take for example, snapping at those around me. I was on edge. Fear will make you act in ways you are not proud of. Fear, I could personally define as my decision to have a lack of trust. I was again putting trust in myself and not asking God to take my fears and give me peace about the results of the test. Its a trend of mine, to try and control things or think of possible outcomes, so that I don't allow it/them to hurt me, or better yet surprise me...because I was already prepared for it in my head.
"Lord, I realize you gave me a huge surprise 8 months ago, but how quickly I forget that lesson."
Trust and let go of the control.
Thankfully the EEG was around the time of his morning nap so he slept like a champ considering he had 15-20 electrodes stuck to his head. I thought he looked pretty cute with his new dreadlocks! :) The test took less than 45 minutes and we were down to get his blood drawn for the thyroid test after that. We are still anticipating those results.
*ps...I hate it when they have to take his blood*
On Wednesday afternoon I went for a run and I was on the home stretch when the message I was listening to was over. I decided to listen to some music and as I posted before, one of my favorite songs is Lord, I need You by Matt Maher. A couple minutes into the song I received a phone call pausing the song. Just as I was confessing that I was in need of the good Lord, I was hearing the nurse say that Jack's results from his EEG came back normal. I had to pull my ear buds out, put my cheek up to the phone, and ask her if I heard her correctly. His results for the EEG were normal? The EEG and not the thyroid? She explained that the doctor got the results back and she was at home and wanted the nurse to call us and tell us the news. I was in tears as I made it back to our house! I was so excited to share with Chris that the results were normal. We weren't thinking we would know for at least a week and I was so grateful she called with the results...just in time for Thanksgiving!
So...give thanks in ALL circumstances...
I have read this verse many times before, but my heart understands more of what it means when it says ALL circumstances. When things don't go as planned, do I still give thanks? I asked this question Wednesday when I received the news that Jack wasn't having seizures, would I still thank Him if he did? Or is this something I only give thanks for when receiving the things I want? This leads me to think about adversity and can I truly say that I thank God for it? I am thankful to say that when reflecting on the adversity that I have experienced so far in my life I can say I am very thankful for it for it as it's prepared me for this season of my life.
GET AFTER IT...
So speaking of adversity...Chris came home a month ago and said he talked to his players about adversity. He told me that he felt it was important to speak to them about how we experienced the news of Jack having Down syndrome. He was starting to notice that after the first two weeks of practice some of the guys were showing frustration about their roles on the team and their playing time. He was seeing how that was effecting the dynamics of the team and decided that he could challenge them with an example of facing things that don't go as one might initially expect. He explained that everyone has a choice and it comes down to the heart. Are you going to GET AFTER IT and lean into it? He expressed to them that one day in life they will face things that are much harder than playing time and chemistry class. What they are faced with today will prepare them for the difficult things that come their way, IF they choose to GET AFTER IT. When Chris was asked, "Are you familiar with Trisomy 21?" there was initial fear, confusion, and grief of what we thought...but we had a choice. If you know Chris at all, he doesn't just do things...he GETS AFTER IT. I expressed this in this blog post in June, but in summary he remembers the exact place where he was when he realized that he GETS to raise Jack and from then on has fully accepted him for the person God created him to be.
So in this season of thanksgiving...I give thanks in ALL circumstances...for the adversity that prepares us for something far greater...and for a husband that encourages me to GET AFTER IT.